On Bravery and Defying Fear

I like to consider myself an adventurous person. One of my favorite things to do when I have down time is to get in my car and drive. Where? If I knew, it wouldn't be fun! My whole goal is to get lost and explore a part of the city (or state) I've never been to before. There are gems hidden throughout these undiscovered places that I enjoy finding. From architecture, to eats, nature and the overall feel of a place, I enjoy exploring.

I've determined that in my life, I will try most everything (don't get crazy, we are talking things within reason) twice.  Why twice? As I see it, my mood can determine whether or not an experience was good. So, if I was in a crappy mood when I first try something, I don't think I gave it a fair shot. Also, let's say I'm trying a new food, I could have gotten a less than awesome batch of whatever I tried.

I say all of that to say: For as curious and adventurous as I may be or appear, I am terribly afraid. What am I scared of? I don't think any honest human being is unfamiliar with my fears.

  • I'm afraid of people knowing my past and judging me.
  • I'm scared I'll be alone forever.
  • I have a fear that one day, the people I'm closest to will jet and the relationships I do have will cease existing.
  • There are moments where I'm afraid that I'll end up at the end of my life having accomplished nothing.

If I'm being completely honest with you, sometimes I don't know if I'm adventurous because that's my personality or if I'm using it as a method of coping so I don't feel so afraid.

What can we do when we're afraid?
Every situation is different, but I believe there are a few things we can do in any circumstance that can help us see with more clarity.

Remind Yourself of God's Faithfulness in Your Life
Sometimes, we glorify our circumstances over God and that's idolatry (and I can assure you, idolatry is a real thing we are all guilty of from time to time). So take a moment and refocus on Him– He's the one who will be present with each step you take.

Surround Yourself with Safe People Who Love You
We all need people in our lives who love us despite where we are emotionally. We also need people to encourage us and sometimes say hard, but truthful, things to us. These people won't laugh at your fears, they'll be patient and honest as you move forward.

Give Yourself a Break
Sometimes, things are scary and there's nothing we can do to change the situation we find ourselves a part of. It's ok! You're not perfect and you won't be ok all the time. Life is hard and fear is a natural reaction to the unknown. You don't have to have it together all the time.

Face Your Fear
Some of the things we face aren't meant to be stared down by one person. Facing a fear isn't always one step process or one time event. Many times, taking action (even if it's a very small action) helps us move passed our fear. Often, we end up realizing that what we were scared of was never as big as we thought.

Wherever in life you find yourself, know that you don't have to live in a constant state of anxiety and fear. I'll leave you with a verse that I read and think on often.

“There is no fear in love, but perfect love casts out fear. For fear has to do with punishment, and whoever fears has not been perfected in love.”
‭‭1 John‬ ‭4:18‬ ‭ESV‬‬

Friends, may we know God as love (1 John 4:8) and be so aware of Him that fear isn't a problem anymore.


Amanda Stokes
(media nerd, part-time time lord, thunderstorm enthusiast)